“Whatever your circumstances may be, Jesus is totally sufficient.”
Oswald Chambers
As a newlywed I learned the difference between a need, a want, and a desire when discussing possible purchases to make. A need denotes what I have to have to live or to survive. A want is something I’d like to have, or I wish for. A desire is what I long or yearn for. God took me by surprise when He flipped what I desired and turned it into a need.
For almost thirty years I struggled, procrastinated, and fought against God’s call to write. I did eventually obey Him, but it was an uphill battle. My fear of failure and facing my weaknesses, and what didn’t come naturally to me, prolonged the process of learning how to write. In the beginning writing was a duty and then seemingly overnight it became a delight. When the switch turned on, I went from desiring to write for Him, out of obedience, to I MUST write for Him out of my need.
If you were to ask me what happened, what steps I took to have a desire become a need, all I could say is that through my acts of obedience, He transformed me. I no longer just wanted to write, I now had to write. Writing has become my daily nourishment.
Being an introvert, my time alone with myself and with Jesus is a necessity, not just a desire. Over an extended period, an absence of having time alone writing, equals a presence of stress. Writing centers me. Because God created me to write, I am most fully me when I’m writing. No wonder there was such a battle; the enemy never wants us to be who God created us to be, because when that happens, God gets the glory. When I lack time and space alone in communion with the Lord, resulting in written thoughts, then I lack the essence of who I am. I am so grateful God never stopped nudging me to write. The Creator always knows what His creation is to look like.
Writing with the Lord, hearing His heart on a matter, becomes my sustenance. Take that away and I’m not myself, just like when I’m fasting food and become weak and irritable, with little things rubbing me the wrong way. I no longer have a desire to write; writing has now become my need. “And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19).
“God does not give us everything we want, but he does fulfill his promises, leading us along the best and straightest paths to himself.”
Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Relevant Reflection:
Describe a time when God transformed a desire into a need.
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