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Norma Donovan

Self-Coaching

“God wants what is best for me, including doing what it takes to grow more like Him.”

Lynn Cowell

The ultimate goal of a healthy life coach, is to help their client become their own coach; to go from life-coaching to self-coaching. It’s all about stewardship: being responsible to take care of yourself, who God created you to be.

I recently took the Enneagram and the result showed I am a #2: A Helper. Helpers are driven by their motivation to be loved and to counteract feelings of unworthiness. When taken to an unhealthy extreme, it’s easy to forget about taking care of myself when I’m so busy taking care of others. Just like on airlines they stress the importance of putting on your own oxygen mask before placing one on a child, so too we need to take care of ourselves first, so we can better care for others. Bill Johnson calls this “sanctified self-centeredness.”

I’m learning how to steward or look after my worthiness. I prove to myself “I am worthy” by taking care of myself. One way I manage my positivity and developer strengths is by celebrating my baby steps of accomplishments. I bought myself a new journal, which I call my “Atta Girl” journal. I record the blog posts I’ve written, the books I’ve read, as well as evaluate how I’m doing.

Another self-coaching technique I use, is making an appointment with myself to have reflection time: assessing what has worked or didn’t work in my weekly schedule and setting new goals. Slowing down my pace, creating margin in my schedule, making God’s calling a priority and adhering to my core values, helps me avoid submitting to the tyranny of the urgent. Awareness of physical sensations which alert us to our emotions, like fear, are similar to the warning lights flashing on our car dashboards, notifying us something needs to be repaired. When fear arises, I can quote Psalm 56 verse three: “When I am afraid, I will trust in You.” I’m intentional with sitting still in God’s presence because hearing His voice is life-giving. God wants us to achieve balance in life and ministry.

Self-coaching involves reframing who I thought I was, to the truth of who God says I am. This includes knowing my self-worth and value and taking responsibility to not be responsible for others. My responsibility is to only do and say what I see my Father doing (John 5:19). It’s my duty to take care of what God has entrusted to me: my time, choices, emotions, physical body, mind and spirit. And because I believe I am worthy, I will be a responsible steward of me!

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”

C.S. Lewis

Relevant Reflection:

What tools do you use to coach yourself?

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